if i only had the heart, open

[victoria hope jean]

She hadn't felt so bad in a long time. She don't know what brought it on all of a sudden, but she knew that she just wanted to go home and do something that, later, she'd regret. She threw her guitar on her back and almost ran out of her dorm. She really just wanted to be outside, playing her guitar, trying to forget everything. She walked out of the building and looked up at the sky. It was a beautiful day; there wasn't a cloud in sight, the sun was shining bright above her, and all she could see was a clear, blue sky that she could easily get lost in. So, why was she feeling so terrible? She wasn't quite sure. It seemed that this mood would come on more and more as each day passed.

Hope sighed and started walking. Where to, she didn't know. She didn't really care, she just needed somewhere comfortable to play her guitar and try to calm down. It seemed that she walked forever, but in reality, it was only ten minutes. She finally found a place to play. She found herself standing in front of the gardens. She'd never been in here much, but she just shrugged her shoulders and walked into the gardens. Her brown eyes looked around for a place, and they stopped at the perfect place. She'd heard that this place had good hiding spots, and it looked like she'd found the perfect one for her. It was nestled between rose bushes, plush grass on the ground to keep her comfortable, and a big tree to lean against. She walked over to it and put her bag and guitar down. She took off her shoes and sat down, leaning against the trunk of the tree.

She sighed and nodded. This was going to be good. She took out her guitar and tuned it to a good tune before strumming it. She immediately started playing one of her favorite songs from The Maine, Whoever She Is. It was a pretty laidback song, the minute she listened to it, she knew that she was going to have to learn it. "I thought I had my girl, but she ran away. My car got stolen and I'm gonna be late..."

[/i] She started singing the song. She hadn't sang any songs since that party, but she thought that maybe it would calm her down. It was working slightly. "She could be money, cars, fear of the dark. Your best friend or just strangers in bars... Whoever she is, whoever she may be. One thing's for sure.. You don't have to worry."[/i]

She didn't realize how much she missed singing until now. She could pour her heart out in her voice, and no one would ever know what she was singing about. Unless she told them, ofcourse.

outfit: click!
notes: it's not the best. but it'll get better. trust me.[/size][/blockquote][/blockquote]

[laineyallen]

Sitting in her dorm a young brunette wondered what she would do. She had already managed to drag herself to her first few classes for the day, but had gotten bored with that and decided to head back to her dorm. Now, she had been sitting on her bed for at least an hour wondering what else there was to do today.

She didn’t know where her roommate was. Usually if they were bored they would have a mini jam session. Today, however, she didn’t seem to be skipping. ‘Too bad’ Lainey thought with a sigh, she would just have to play alone for a change. The young brunette stood and walked over to her acoustic guitar stand and picked up the wooden instrument. She strapped it onto her back, picked up her purse and walked out of the dorm.

A change of scenery would be good and the young woman knew just the place. After exiting the building, Lainey looked up as she walked. It was a beautiful day. She wondered why she had been sitting inside this whole time. She should have been out here the whole time.

She approached her favorite place in this god forsaken place, the gardens. Lainey had discovered this place early. In fact, it was the first place she had gone after being shown her dorm. The young brunette didn’t know why, but the beautiful flowers seemed to call to her. Now, the changing leaves and the fresh cool air made her feel at home in a place she defiantly didn’t call home.

Lainey stopped at the sound of a voice, singing to be exact. She listened carefully and found that she didn’t recognize the voice. ‘Strange’ she thought walking closer to the sound. Maybe she wasn’t the only person who found the gardens to be the perfect place to sing. The brunette smiled slightly when she saw feet and a glint of wood between some bushes. She knew exactly where the singer, girl, by the sound of her voice, was hiding. It was probably the most perfect place to play in the gardens. Standing right next to the girls spot Lainey stopped and waited for her to finish her song.

When she heard the voice stop she quietly spoke. “What song was that?” she asked curiously. She didn’t want to startle the girl, doing that here could potentially end in bodily harm, but she was honestly curious having never heard that song before.
Outfit: Here, Tag: Victoria

[victoria hope jean]

Some people found different ways of forgetting about things. That's why alot of them were here. They would use drugs, sex, or alcohol to forget about things. Hope, however, used music. Well, she was in here for her suicide attempts and self-harm, so she was just as fucked up. She used pain to forget about things. She tried to just use music now, but it didn't always work. She tried to block out the memories from her mind, and lately it had been working, but today they started coming back, and harder than ever. People were asking her why she was so closed off, but she couldn't find the courage to answer. There were only certain people that she told what happened to her. And lately, she only told one other person; but she felt like she could trust that one person.

Hope shook those thoughts from her mind and closed her eyes, continuing on with the song. "And this is the part where you find out who you are. And these are the friends, those who've been there from the start. So to hell with the bad news; dirt on your new shoes. It rained all May, 'til the month of June."

[/i] She sang the chorus again before just playing the guitar for a while. She decided to skip the next part, it not really having that much effect on her. All she needed was the music, she knew the lyrics in her heart. Besides, it's not like anyone was listening. She didn't have to sing if she didn't want to. She only sang for herself, now. She didn't sing for a couple of minutes before her favorite line in the song came up, "To hell with the new shit. And whether or not you think you fit in."[/i]

The rest of the song was just the chorus again, so she finished singing that before finishing with the guitar. She bit her bottom lip and closed her eyes for a moment. It was silent for a few moments before she heard a quiet voice near her. It startled her, no matter how quiet, and she jumped slightly. She turned her head to where the voice came from to see a girl standing over her. She smiled softly at the girl and ran her hands over the strings of her guitar, thinking about the song she just sang. "It was Whoever She Is by a band called, The Maine. They're pretty amazing," She said, quietly.[/size][/blockquote][/blockquote]

[laineyallen]

Lainey smiled softly as she finished listening to the girl. While she didn't know the song, but the girls voice was beautiful.

Lainey had grown up with music being a big part of her life. It had been like a family to her. Whenever her parents went away for work or play or to just get away she would immerse herself in it and it would take her someplace else. She could tell that this girl had a similar reaction to music.

The young woman glanced around looking for a place to sit down. Settling for a spot against a tree across from the girl, the brunette moved over a few feet and sat down placing her guitar gently against the tree.

“They are nice” She responded smiling over to the girl. “I’m Lainey, I don’t believe we have met before,” she finished still smiling. The young brunette couldn’t recall meeting this girl before and honestly, Lainey was surprised. Most of the musically inclined students had gotten together at some point to hang out and jam.

Note: It kinda bad but hopefully it'll get better lol

[victoria hope jean]

Hope smiled warmly at the girl as she sat down and nodded, "You should check them out. I know most of their songs on guitar and even piano," she said, just strumming her guitar now, "I'm Hope. I'm sure we haven't. I haven't been here long; maybe a month or so. I don't get out much."

Which was true, she would rather stay in her dorm, so she wouldn't have to bother with anyone, but lately she'd found herself going outside more and more. She was growing to actually like this place. She could talk to people, knowing that they had a problem too. That's why they were here; whether they wanted to admit it or not. She started into a new song, If I Only Had The Heart from The Maine, but she didn't sing it. She didn't really feel the need to sing, especially since she had someone here that she could talk too.

She found out that alot of people here were actually quite nice, even some of the high risks. She looked the girl that was sitting next to her over, she seemed to look nice. Hopefully, she'd make a new friend today,.

notes: don't worry, mine sucked majorly.. Lol.

[laineyallen]

Lainey pulled her guitar over to her from its place against the tree. Her hands were getting bored and the girls music made her miss the sound of her own stringed instrument. She nodded at the girls response seeing no need to break the music to reply before softly strumming along picking up on the girls pattern and chords.

She allowed herself to get lost in the music for a moment. It was magical, music. Lainey could never get enough. After a moment she remembered that there was someone else around and took herself out of the trance like state she had been in.

Maybe today would be a good day to make a new friend. "So what are you in for?" Lainey had noticed that people were in here for some stupid things. Her theory was that parents just didn't want to deal with their kids anymore. That was the case with Lainey at least. There really wasn't anything wrong with her. Her parents just were not ready to be parents.

[/size]

[victoria hope jean]

Hope couldn't help but smile when the girl began to pick up on the song that she was playing. It sounded just as good with two guitars playing, if not better. She hadn't met many people that played guitar with as much passion as she did, so to know that this girl was into music made her smile. She needed some friends she could play, and possibly sing, with. She hadn't really played with anyone since her brother, but why should that stop her from playing with others? It shouldn't.

She allowed herself to close her eyes and just listen to the music that the two were playing. It calmed her down greatly to hear the sounds of guitar or piano playing. A lot of people didn't really think of music, that it was just something to hear; but she knew that it was more. Music told a story, no matter how silly the story might be. She could pour her heart and soul into her music.

When Lainey asked Hope what she was in here for, she realized that most of the people she met here were probably going to ask her that. Humans were curious creatures, they couldn't help that. She didn't know if Lainey would count her problems and ridiculous or not, seeing as a lot of people thought them to be kind of serious, she went with the latter, "Umm, I'm in here for suicidal attempts and an eating disorder," she said, scrunching up her nose as she said it. She hated that she was that fucked up, but she knew that she needed help. Unlike some of the kids here, that's what she wanted. She wanted to get better, "And yourself? If you don't mind my asking, ofcourse."