'tis better as it is(open)

[amanda]

Amanda was sitting in her room, reading Othello, for about the millionth times. But this time it was for school, something she didn't mind doing at all. She hardly ever ventured out of her room, to many guys. When she was in the room, it was her and her roommate. That was it. It was the best thing she could think of.

As she read, she just couldn't concentrate at all. Her music was playing and it just wasn't working out at all. She sighed and stood up and slid on her sneakers and grabbed her guitar and her book.

She slid her ipod into her pocket and walked out of her room and out the dorms, thinking of a good place to avoid guys. Gardens. Most guys didn't like pretty flowers and things, but Amanda loved them.

As she ventured to the garden, slinging her guitar strap on her shoulder and fixing her book in arm as she neared the garden. She walked past everyone and went towards a tree. Sitting her guitar against the tree and sitting down, placing the book on her lap, she still couldn't get into it.

She placed the book down, grabbed her guitar and began to play the music in her ears. Which happened to be Nirvana, Smells Like Teen Spirit. She closed her eyes, relaxing completely, blocking everything around her. Ah, these were the times she liked, just her and music as one.

[james thomas leroy]

James stopped mid-step when he heard a familiar tune. He moved forward toward the sound, creeping ever slowly toward it before stopped just before the door. Leaning against the wall, he closed his eyes and listened for a moment. Nirvana. He knew it well but most kids in his generation were all about the crappy music with people that just whined and complained about stupid things that didn't matter.

Nirvana was something that James had always found he could listen to. He was never sure what it was about it that appealed to him. Perhaps it was the chaotic mess of a state that some of their songs were in, yet they still managed to find some sort of pattern. It was something he appreciated, not being understood but knowing that things made sense in some way, even if it was only to you.

Letting the sounds of the guitar chords wash over him, he heard the words in his head and his fingers began to tap lightly against the cold hard wall behind him. He waited until it was near the end before he rolled over to the frame of the door and held it firmly as he peered into the room before taking a step over and simply standing there, leaning against the frame as he walked the girl.

"Not bad," he spoke when she played the last note. He had seen here before, somewhere down these hallways. It was inevitable really. The place was pretty small and coming across a face you had seen at least once before was a common occurrence.

[amanda]

Amanda froze as the song in her ear slowly faded and she heard a male voice coming from the same room. She found it interesting, that she could read and listen to things written by men without flipping. Maybe it was the fact that she would never come across them in her life. One of the reasons she doesn't go to book signings or concerts, no need to ruin her little image of them being better than they really are.

She began by ignoring him, trying to anyway. She just couldn't forget that he was there, it was like an annoying itch that she couldn't scratch. It was in the back of her mind as her Ipod(on shuffle) switched from Nirvana to Metallica, yet another guy. She began playing that as she ignored the guy standing there.

Finally giving up the ignoring ruitine, since he seemed to not be going away, she switched to being a bitch. She sat her guitar down and pressed pause, "Do you want something?" She gave him the glare that usually worked on most people and put hatred into her words, not that it was hard she really did hate him. Even if she didn't know him. "Or are you just here to annoy the fuck out of me?"

[james thomas leroy]

James watched as she seemed to completely ignore him. At first he figured she hadn't heard him but he stayed anyway. Silently watching her, not bothering to say a word this time. His arms were folded across his chest and he watched her carefully until she stopped.

She wasn't half bad with her instruments and James could appreciate skill in any capacity. It was good to see people doing things well. Too bad for him the one thing he did well tended to get him into trouble. For some reason being excellent at dissecting was not something people applauded.

She seemed angry as she spoke and James just watched her, not at all phased by that tone or her demeanor. Anger was something he didn't care much about. People were upset and angry with him all the time, and it didn't make even a bit of difference to him.

"There's no need to be rude," James told her, faking a smile as he looked at her for a moment before switching to being entirely disinterested while he studied his fingernails for a moment.

"I was only walking by and I heard you playing," he explained. "You weren't half bad so I stayed to listen," he told her, as though an explanation would make some kind of difference.

[amanda]

Amanda just glared, she wasn't rude, or well she wasn't rude to most people. She just didn't like being bothered, and if playing rude worked well she was happy about that. But sometimes, well it doesn't work, she hoped these weren't one of these dqays.

"Well what if I didn't want you to listen?" She rolled her eyes and leaned her head against the wall as she started to doodle again, she was annoyed that this guy wanted to talk. He didn't like when people talked to her. Apparently they didn't get she didn't want them talking.

Standing up she walked over to him, and was obviously shorter then him but she stood straight and glared up at him. "I don't want you to listen. I don't want you to talk. I want to be left again."

Hate was pouring out of her like someone turned on a faucet and it was running down her body. She refused to turn her back on him so she wasn't going to walk past him. Instead she'd try to get him to leave first then she'd leave as well.

[james thomas leroy]

James paused for just a second at the hypothetical situation she had posed. "Then you wouldn't have left the door open," he told her, speaking as though it truly was all hypothetical. It seemed like a reasonable thing to him and made all the sense in the world but perhaps she hadn't thought to do it. Perhaps she didn't expect ayone to happen by and stop to hear the notes she played. No, this was by no means a busy hallway but people went by all the time, he was certain she should have considered that.

James tilted his head as he watched her. She seemed so angry and frustrated when he hadn't done much to cause that level of hatred that seemed to be pouring out of her in waves. If it were anyone else, they might have felt unwanted but James' curiousity got hte better of him once again and he just smiled at down at her, keeping his position, leaning against the door frame.

"Why?" he asked. Had it been something he did or said? Was she angry prior to his arival? No, he might have noticed that. What made her so mad? James had to know.

[amanda]

His statement made Amanda pause for a second and think about it. Why did she do that? It's like her subconcious wanted her to get attacked by some asshole or something. Wait. Um No. She must not of thought about it. She was upset. Yup that was it. It had nothing to do with wanting to be around anyone. She wanted to be alone. Yup she was sure of it. "Because I didn't think about it," she hissed at him. God was this guy a fucking moron? No one thought about what the hell they are doing every damn second of every damn day.

She bit down on her tongue, trying to stay calm. It was hard, she didn't want to be calm. She wanted to be angry. She wanted to throw something at him. She wanted to smash her guitar across his head and storm off. She felt the beating desire to hurt him. To get him to leave her alone. She always felt that way. That she'd do anything to be left alone. Anything at all. Her fear was huge. She didn't have the ability to do anything about it. She had tried over and over again. But each time, she kept failing. Over and over again.

"Because I do," she said. "I just want you to get the hell out of here."

[james thomas leroy]

"I suppose you are only human and humans make mistakes," he said. He had made a few in his time.. Well, not really mistakes so much as things going wrong in his plans and not having the right told to fix said errors. Yes, that was it, James didn't make mistakes, other people would simply come in and make a mess of everything for him.

It was something she had missed and James just couldn't grasp the fact that she could miss something so huge. Sure, little things might go unnoticed but if she specifically intended to be along then shutting the door was the first and biggest step to gaining that privacy. It was the most obvious thing in his opinion.. Well, either way, he was here now and he couldn't simply leave, not when this girl was being so angry about nothing in particular.. At least, nothing that he noticed.

"Why?" he asked again, incredibly calm as usual but this time adding a little more to his simple question. "I haven't done or said anything wrong," he pointed out. "So there must be some other reason why you don't want me here. What is it?" he asked. Did she not like people in general? Did she hate people? Did he not want company of any kind or was it just him? And what about him set him apart even to warrant this kind of a reaction?

[amanda]

And we were never alive
And we won't be born again

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credit to lenalethal of caution 2.0

Yes Amanda was human, but she didn't make mistakes. Or she tried not too. Mistakes lead to getting caught off guard. Getting caught off guard led to her getting freaking out. And she didn't like it. So this stupid mistake really bugged the crap out of her. Why did she have to be so...dumb?

Her stupidity just filled her anger even more then before and she crossed her arm and began tapping her foot repeatedly. Could he just fucking leave? It would make all of this go away and she wouldn't have to deal with any of it. Then she could go back to playing and being semi-happy. That's all she wanted, why did this school have to consist of too many people being ass fucks?

"There isn't a specific reason. At least not one I'm giving to you," she said with a roll of her eyes. Really? Did this guy not get a hint? "I just rather you or no one be here. Now GO."

But I'll never survive
Dead Memories In My HEART[/font][/color][/size][/center]

tags;james
notes;she no likey him XD
words;one seven four
outfit;here
music;dead memories;slipknot

[james thomas leroy]

Getting so emotionally unstable was not a smart thing to do. From what he could tell, some people just couldn't help themselves. They would get too involved with something and that would be the end of any rational thought they may have had. It got in the way and made it difficult to come to some sort of agreement or resolution and right now, this girl was going off the deep end.

James just watched her when she spoke again. She really didn't want him here and she was being very angry about it. Angry, what was causing that? Considering he had done nothing to provoke her, it had to have been something else. Fear was a good explanation.

He crossed his arms but didn't move from his spot, leaning against the door frame. This time he gave it another moment of silence, not talking, just standing there, not being a threat of any kind. He knew she still wouldn't like it but it was entertaining to him. What would she do? How would she react? If he didn't say anything what would she do? Would she get violent or yell at him some more? Because either way it wasn't working terribly well.

[amanda]

Amanda was not a happy camper at all and she mentally cursed herself as she watched him stay there. Why did people really have to bother her? Did they not have lives or something? Or better things to do then make a girl mad. Especially this girl. She rather him go mess with somebody else for all she cared.

So she decided if yelling at him wasn't going to work,she'd try ignoring him again. So she gave him a fake smile, rolled her eyes and backed up to where she had been sitting and grabbed her guitar again. Placing her headphones in her ears she waved goodbye and pressed play.

Not that she was actually listening to her music. She was staring at him, well not really. She was staring at the wall but still from the corner of her eyes she was watching him,willing him to leave to disappear to go somewhere and bother someone else. She wasn't sure it was working bug for fucks sake she wished it would.

She ran a hand through her hair and thought about how no one had bothered her at home. Hardly except that new kid, but he didn't know what she was capable of. And then she stabbed him and she's sure he'd never mess with her again. But why here of all places do people actually have to stay. Why couldn't they be normal and fuck off.

[james thomas leroy]

James stood but she was silent. She hadn't said a word in minutes and he thought that another outburst might be just around the corner but there was nothing now. She was ignoring him and quite successfully so.

The way she had gotten angry, he was certain this couldn't last. He thought she might not have it in her but as another minute past he was beginning to doubt his previous assessment. She was really taking this quite seriously.

This was just plain boring. Perhaps there wasn't much to her. Maybe she just didn't want him there because she didn't. Did it matter? Not terribly much. James decided that if he truly did want to know more he could always just ask Cameron about this girl.

"Fine, you win," he said, turning and walking away. He wasn't going to stand around and waste precious time if nothing was going to happen. No, James had better things to do with his time.